January 2, 2011

Two weeks ago there was such joy in us....We were at my parent's home for an early Christmas gathering...When we got there Little Rob met me at the door with a hug...a big smile that lit up his entire face...and "Hi, Aunt Jenny"as he always did....I can still hear his voice say it...

Later while we were there, he came and sat in my lap and put his arm around me...I remember thinking that he wouldn't be doing that much longer because he's growing up and not a little boy anymore....

My nephew was 13, and not afraid to show affection to his family and never did I ever come or go  that I didn't get a hug, smile, kiss, or "I love you Aunt Jenny" in that childlike voice....Loving his family was never uncool for him to do or embarrassed him...


He loved his cousins....He was always playing with them...He loved to tote Luke around  the very first time he saw him...He just played with Luke(4) and my other nephew, Jackson(almost 3), that day....


He left that day before us....He was going to church with my brother and sister- in-law so they could practice for their Christmas program...He came and hugged me for what I didn't know would be the last time...he kissed me and said "I love you Aunt Jenny" and then he was gone...


For some reason this day has been my hardest...I think the numbness is wearing off...The house is quiet....Just me and my thoughts and memories........................I love you little Rob...hugs and kisses from your Aunt Jenny!

23 comments:

Unknown said...

Thinking of you Jenny while you are trying to get through these difficult days.

Hugs,
Trudy

Robin Leuschen said...

I am so choked up right now...I have felt that stinging pain of loss , after the numbness wears off...I am so sorry you are going through this right now...I wish ( I'm sure all your friends, acuqaintances do ) that there was something I could say or do to just instantly wipe the pain away and take you back to the joy that was in your heart before this tragic accident....Of course that can't happen, but try to bask in the love and heartfelt sympathy and empathy that is surrounding you and your family right now....Some day the pain will lessen....I'm still praying for peace and comfort for you and yours....
God Bless You..
Hugs,
Robin

Primsue said...

Jen, I am praying that God will surround you with peace and comfort during this heartbreaking time.

Hugs & Prayers,
Sue

Dawn said...

My prayers are with you and your family. May you feel Gods grace.

Ladybug said...

Oh Jenny my heart is so heavy for
you,praying the Lord will surround
his Peace and Hold you tight in his
arms of comfort and love, the post was so very touching,So glad you
shared writing our thoughts in times of hurt and pain refeshes the
Spirit in the process of healing...
Hugs.& Prayers
Trish

lakeffect said...

My heart is heavy for you and your family. I am praying for all of you.

LibbiesHome said...

I hope that you can find some comfort in knowing that you and your family remain in the thoughts and prayers of many, many people. I wish there was something more we could do to help the hurt.

WoolenSails said...

My heart goes out to you and your family.
He has touched a bit of all of our hearts.

Debbie

renee said...

Jen,
I am saddened for your family. I understand that pain, it's something that we all experience at some point in life.
I know that there's not much that can be said, it won't bring him back, but knowing that your family is surrounded by the comforts of our savior will help sustain you all through this time. It's not something that just goes away, pain is real, but healing does begin when the time passes. Everyone handles things differently, I am just so very sorry, especially when it's a child, it's very hard. I lost a brother, he was an infant, and I know the pain I watched my parents' go through. Thinking of you all.

quiltsbycheri said...

there are no words of comfort i can say, the loss of someone so young and dear to you can put you in a completely different dimension...grief is a dreaded process that somehow brings you back to life, crying every single tear till there aren't anymore...the missing of rob, of course, will never go away the memories will be tresures and he will be with you in everything you do....life does come back...i'm so sorry that your family has to endure this tragedy....try to remember that time does not heal grief, it is taking the time to grieve that will help the healing...it has been four years for us and memories come sometimes with smiles and laughter not only sorrow...take care cheri

a thought when your ready maybe search for some blogs dealing with loss, talking and sharing always helps...and sharing with those who have experienced the same pain can be helpful, anything that works is what's right, grieving is not the same in everyone....

i wish your family peace someday

Debbie said...

I am so sorry for your loss. Although we don't know each other, I felt your pain as I read your blogs about the loss of your nephew. As I held my little boy all I could think is I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child. You and your family are in my prayers. Debbie G

DORIS LUTTRELL said...

JENNY, SO SORRY FOR THE LOSS OF THIS SWEET, SWEET CHILD....WILL BE PRAYING FOR EVERYONG....

Dan said...

Jen~

I was so sadden to hear the news of your nephew. I know that this is an unbelievably hard time for you and your family, but please know that you are all in my thoughts and prayers.

~Dan~

Mad Red Hare said...

Such a tragedy. But by blogging about your memories, they will be there forever! He sounds like an amazing young man. I think anytime a young person dies, it is harder to accept.

Birgit said...

I am so terribly sorry to hear of your family's loss in such a tragic way. My heart goes out to all of you and please know that you are all in my prayers. I hope you all find comfort in the arms of God through this.
Hugs to you~ Birgit

Connie said...

My heart go out to you and your family, we had prayer today at church for you and the family and prayer are coming your way, May God with you all.

Robyn ♥ said...

Every post I read, I tear up. I feel such pain and sadness for you,I can't even fathom what you or your brother and sister-in-law are feeling. I am so sorry. Please give your brother and SIL a hug and express my condolences.

Heather said...

Hello Jenny, I found your blog through another and read your post. Tears fell as I read on and my heart hurt so deeply for you. I could never imagine the pain you and your family feel. I am so sorry. I pray for you and your family strength, comfort, and peace.

A Primitive Homestead said...

As I read your posts my heart fills with sadness for all of you. I find myself thinking & wondering how you are all doing during my days. I know we have never met but over the months of reading your blog & the shocking post of the loss of such a precious child it is hard not to worry about his parents & all of you. I wish there were words to say that would make it all better for all of you. Your precious nephew has touched so many of us. Some times I find comfort in the memories of the last time I spoke with my Gram. The night before she went into a coma & passed 4 days later. We told each other we loved each other at the end of our phone conversation that night. I often think God made sure I had that one last special memory to hold on to. Because when I fill the sadness the most I hear her words. I love you. I pray your nephews words of love help you also. You are all in my thoughts & prayers.

Siobhán said...

I am so, so sorry. There are no words to express how sorry I am that your family has to endure this loss. Know that your family is being thought of and remembered in prayers.

Unknown said...

So sorry for your family loss. We never know when the last time will be, but he is an angel watching over his whole family.

My Colonial Home said...

Awww Jen, how touching.
The love and sweetness of children is such a precious gift.

I'm so happy you and Robby had that kind of relationship and you know Jen, that's what is going to carry you through knowing you both were 'friends' as well as relatives.

I know he'll be missed but oh you have such beautiful and personal memories.

Bless you all and I know your voice will sound like an Angel.
Hugs, Karen

Robin said...

Hi Jen~ keeping you close my friend in thought and prayer.